Lyrics from Diana Ross's "I'm Coming Out" really relates to how I want to be senior year
There 's a new me coming out
And I just have to live
And I wanna give
I'm completely positive
I think this time around
I am gonna do it
Like you never knew it
Ooh, I'll make it through
The time has come for me
To break out of the shell
I have to shout
That I am coming out
I'm coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out
I want the world to know
I got to let it show
I've got to show the world
All that I wanna be
And all my billities
There's so much more to me
Somehow, I have to make them
Just understand
I got it well in hand
And, oh, how I've planned
I'm spreadin' love
There is no need to fear
And I just feel so good
Everytime I hear:
I'm coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
the short blog about LSL
I’m late by a few days haha but I'm eventually going to blog about it. In a few words it was AMAZING. that's only one word but it's good enough. It's really late and it would take me forever to blog about every single thing because I don't want to leave anything out! my hair looks gross! haha
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Happy 17th Birthday Jocelyn!
lots of walking & eatingand some lvy goodness
Today I had meeting for LSL. Kinda nervous for it and kind of a little excited. Nervous for meeting other people and just that whole getting to know you sort of thing, and also finding a friend there. I really hope I won't be friendless or even buddyless. Maybe this experience will be a good one and I can learn a lot of stuff. Actually being LVY really changed me. It's definitley changed how I meet other people and socializing. I guess when you're given a leadership role you just get that boost of confidence that you're in charge of something and people are looking to you for guidence. Something like that. I feel like I can't fully explain it because I'm really tired right now. I think I'm less paranoid about meeting other people, still might be awkward but I try not to think about that first. I could go on but I just made this blog a lot longer than i wanted it to be. omg I am so excited to be in charge of the prayer service! *sarcasm
I think this is the second day I've walked the most, 1st was independence day. It's tough getting Jocelyn a gift, you aren't really sure what she wants or needs. But Maria, Cassandra, and me did it! We got her oil pastels, charcoal pencils, clay eraser, twix, blending stubs, and this cute jar shaped like a bear. I think she liked it. First I had to walk up the hill to get to the california bus stop, so tiring considering it was also hot. I LOVE NICE WEATHER! and before that my mom and me had sushi at japan town. that soba special really filled me up. Anyways we walked everywhere getting parts for Jocelyn's gift. I really miss Jocelyn, I haven't actually hung out with her for a long time like just 3 or 4 people or even hanging out at her house playing sims, I'll always remember that. She works sooo hard! She really is an inspiration or even a sign to get my butt going to get some work done. balancing out work and free time is pretty important. I should try to remember that. I think Jocelyn deserves a break, or at least 1 day off of her constantly busy schedule. I don't remember myself getting so full from dinner. It was nice having so many plates of food and I'm still fuuuulll. thanks for the dinner jocelyn, I miss you and I hope you had a happy birthday =)
We had a good conversation..
dotluvsu: it's still like that when you get a little older
dotluvsu: and personally
dotluvsu: i don't think that means you're a different person
dotluvsu: you just show different sides of you at different times
dotluvsu: because some things are appropriate at certain times
dotluvsu: and not appropriate at other times
i said something here like yeah i like talking about this stuff and then she told me
dotluvsu: hehe
dotluvsu: you probably won't get this now
dotluvsu: but you can think of it this way
dotluvsu: one day, when you are in a relationship with someone
dotluvsu: you will have to show them all sides of you
dotluvsu: good bad
dotluvsu: appropriate
dotluvsu: inappropriate
dotluvsu: and the way you know that person is right for you
dotluvsu: is that they will accept you for exactly who you are
dotluvsu: for all the different sides of you
Today I had meeting for LSL. Kinda nervous for it and kind of a little excited. Nervous for meeting other people and just that whole getting to know you sort of thing, and also finding a friend there. I really hope I won't be friendless or even buddyless. Maybe this experience will be a good one and I can learn a lot of stuff. Actually being LVY really changed me. It's definitley changed how I meet other people and socializing. I guess when you're given a leadership role you just get that boost of confidence that you're in charge of something and people are looking to you for guidence. Something like that. I feel like I can't fully explain it because I'm really tired right now. I think I'm less paranoid about meeting other people, still might be awkward but I try not to think about that first. I could go on but I just made this blog a lot longer than i wanted it to be. omg I am so excited to be in charge of the prayer service! *sarcasm
I think this is the second day I've walked the most, 1st was independence day. It's tough getting Jocelyn a gift, you aren't really sure what she wants or needs. But Maria, Cassandra, and me did it! We got her oil pastels, charcoal pencils, clay eraser, twix, blending stubs, and this cute jar shaped like a bear. I think she liked it. First I had to walk up the hill to get to the california bus stop, so tiring considering it was also hot. I LOVE NICE WEATHER! and before that my mom and me had sushi at japan town. that soba special really filled me up. Anyways we walked everywhere getting parts for Jocelyn's gift. I really miss Jocelyn, I haven't actually hung out with her for a long time like just 3 or 4 people or even hanging out at her house playing sims, I'll always remember that. She works sooo hard! She really is an inspiration or even a sign to get my butt going to get some work done. balancing out work and free time is pretty important. I should try to remember that. I think Jocelyn deserves a break, or at least 1 day off of her constantly busy schedule. I don't remember myself getting so full from dinner. It was nice having so many plates of food and I'm still fuuuulll. thanks for the dinner jocelyn, I miss you and I hope you had a happy birthday =)
We had a good conversation..
dotluvsu: it's still like that when you get a little older
dotluvsu: and personally
dotluvsu: i don't think that means you're a different person
dotluvsu: you just show different sides of you at different times
dotluvsu: because some things are appropriate at certain times
dotluvsu: and not appropriate at other times
i said something here like yeah i like talking about this stuff and then she told me
dotluvsu: hehe
dotluvsu: you probably won't get this now
dotluvsu: but you can think of it this way
dotluvsu: one day, when you are in a relationship with someone
dotluvsu: you will have to show them all sides of you
dotluvsu: good bad
dotluvsu: appropriate
dotluvsu: inappropriate
dotluvsu: and the way you know that person is right for you
dotluvsu: is that they will accept you for exactly who you are
dotluvsu: for all the different sides of you
Sunday, July 12, 2009
sorry i left you
THE RANDOM THOUGHT BLOG
I haven't been blogging in a long time. I think I'm just too lazy, but if I start now maybe I'll keep up with it. I don't know why but some of these days are just getting boring. I need to go out there and do something so I won't have to stare at the screen the whole day and also pig out on snacks. Speaking of snacks, I think tomorrow I'm going to make cupcakes. I'm supposed to have a meeting on either the 14th or the 16th about LSL and I haven't started that slideshow yet.. and I don't even know if Elena finalized the script.. I got a webcam! except that my faces takes up a lot of space lol Finished with Life as We Knew it, which is a really good book. I can't believe that was our summer reading book. I would have more things to do if I was in an AP class or some form of a class that shows a college, "Hey this person tried and was somewhat smart." This blog is jumble of things going in my mind I guess. I wonder if I'm ever going to pay Alyssa back. I wonder if other people don't trust me to lend me money because I haven't payed her back. I need to volunteer! I need more sleep. I need to clean my room. I need to exercise. LEARN HOW TO RIDE A BICYCLE! gosh Stephanie do something productive with your life and stop wasting away your summer and then when you're in school you have to worry about college and do applications and personal statements and then you wish it were summer again and that you had started then. The stupid computer doesn't get cd's but gets dvd's. I hate when technology fails. tiiiiiiiiiired. MJ, your music and your dance moves will always be the best! rest in peace. I wonder if maria has any classes with me. I better do something so I can feel the beautiful feeling of being accomplished. I am so lazy! and if that's not even worse, my gpa will make me be rejected from most uc's. I am so pessimistic! I'd like to order some optimism please, BJ. I don't think this blog should be read, and I don't think I'll read it again lol
One time i was in bed after I read my summer reading book and somehow I just thought of how honest I am to other people. I don't think I am truthfully honest to other people, even though I think I'm an honest person. Is that a different thing? I guess honesty can have different meanings. There are some things that I will never tell a person directly to them. It's not an insult, but what i was thinking was my relationship with other people. I don't think they honestly know what I think about them. Anyways when I was about to sleep I thought of the idea of writing everybody a letter about how honestly I thought our relationship was and how to improve it. If only life was that easy and I could tell them in person how I really thought about them and empty out some feelings from my brain. It would be cool if my family and my friends told me what they thought about me. I know i would be a little sensitive to some of the comments, but I'm not a perfect person. Sometimes I wish I could be that friendly person that everybody likes and isn't made fun of or looked down on. Maybe there isn't really a person like that because everyone has some kind of problem right? I don't know.. Back to writing a letter, I think I just thought of that because I realized I'm not thaat close to my family. They don't really know much about me I think. Also some of my friends don't know me all too well either. I wonder sometimes what my family and some of my friends think of me. and to think all this came from my summer reading book! ok I'm done no more thinking about this so much cause i'm tired.
sorry this blog was not very readable.. forgot to mention some other things like hangouts, but I'll mention that later maybe :)
I haven't been blogging in a long time. I think I'm just too lazy, but if I start now maybe I'll keep up with it. I don't know why but some of these days are just getting boring. I need to go out there and do something so I won't have to stare at the screen the whole day and also pig out on snacks. Speaking of snacks, I think tomorrow I'm going to make cupcakes. I'm supposed to have a meeting on either the 14th or the 16th about LSL and I haven't started that slideshow yet.. and I don't even know if Elena finalized the script.. I got a webcam! except that my faces takes up a lot of space lol Finished with Life as We Knew it, which is a really good book. I can't believe that was our summer reading book. I would have more things to do if I was in an AP class or some form of a class that shows a college, "Hey this person tried and was somewhat smart." This blog is jumble of things going in my mind I guess. I wonder if I'm ever going to pay Alyssa back. I wonder if other people don't trust me to lend me money because I haven't payed her back. I need to volunteer! I need more sleep. I need to clean my room. I need to exercise. LEARN HOW TO RIDE A BICYCLE! gosh Stephanie do something productive with your life and stop wasting away your summer and then when you're in school you have to worry about college and do applications and personal statements and then you wish it were summer again and that you had started then. The stupid computer doesn't get cd's but gets dvd's. I hate when technology fails. tiiiiiiiiiired. MJ, your music and your dance moves will always be the best! rest in peace. I wonder if maria has any classes with me. I better do something so I can feel the beautiful feeling of being accomplished. I am so lazy! and if that's not even worse, my gpa will make me be rejected from most uc's. I am so pessimistic! I'd like to order some optimism please, BJ. I don't think this blog should be read, and I don't think I'll read it again lol
One time i was in bed after I read my summer reading book and somehow I just thought of how honest I am to other people. I don't think I am truthfully honest to other people, even though I think I'm an honest person. Is that a different thing? I guess honesty can have different meanings. There are some things that I will never tell a person directly to them. It's not an insult, but what i was thinking was my relationship with other people. I don't think they honestly know what I think about them. Anyways when I was about to sleep I thought of the idea of writing everybody a letter about how honestly I thought our relationship was and how to improve it. If only life was that easy and I could tell them in person how I really thought about them and empty out some feelings from my brain. It would be cool if my family and my friends told me what they thought about me. I know i would be a little sensitive to some of the comments, but I'm not a perfect person. Sometimes I wish I could be that friendly person that everybody likes and isn't made fun of or looked down on. Maybe there isn't really a person like that because everyone has some kind of problem right? I don't know.. Back to writing a letter, I think I just thought of that because I realized I'm not thaat close to my family. They don't really know much about me I think. Also some of my friends don't know me all too well either. I wonder sometimes what my family and some of my friends think of me. and to think all this came from my summer reading book! ok I'm done no more thinking about this so much cause i'm tired.
sorry this blog was not very readable.. forgot to mention some other things like hangouts, but I'll mention that later maybe :)
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